I CUT MYSELF ON A PIECE OF YOU

This is a piece i painted about three years ago when i was pregnant with my daughter. i felt bautyfull and a little bit violent when i created this. people always ask me to describe my art...tell them what im feeling at the time i painted it. what i can tell you is that the girl with the sunlight in her eyes is me and im missing someone. the words all around are my feelings at that precice moment. " on that day the fourth of july burns in her mind, she sings in her sleep and hides in her dreams" this is only a small part i'll let you figure out the rest on your own.

eMily eleiZaBETH sOmEoNe. tHiS iS tHe nEw nAme oF mY bLoG. ThIS Is MY cOnFUsIoN. Im EmILy Yes.....eLiZaBeTh fOr SUre. FoRmERlY wILcOX mArRiEd To A ShAFfER BuT nEvEr ChAnGED mY nAmE. So NoW iM sTUcK. WhO am I??? tHis iS tHe qUeStIoN?? CaN SoMeOnE pLeASe hElP Me? I NoW dEClArE My SeLf EMilY elIzAbEtH sOmEOnE. ThiS is mY nAmE No qUeSTIoNs aSkED.

for your eating disorder convienience.

ThIS LITTLE BEAUTY WAS MADE FOR ONE OF MY BESTEST FRIENDS IN THE ENTIRE WORLD....SHE CONFIDED IN ME ABOUT AN EATING DISORDER...SO I PAINTED THIS FOR HER. SEREOUSLY THO WHO HASENT TRIED IT OUT FOR SIZE? THE THING ABOUT EATING DISORDERS IS THAT THEY ARE NOT FOR THE WEAK...TRUST ME. ONE OF MY FAVORITE STORIES WAS IN A BOOK ABOUT A GIRL WHO LIVED ALONE IN THE DORMS FOR A SUMMER AND LIVED OFF OF ONE BAG OF ORANGES...SHE THEN PAINTED HERSELF IN THE NUDE TO SEE THE CHANGE. STARVATION ARTISTS AMAZE ME. I COULD NEVER DO IT. BUT TO MY DEAR FRIEND I LOVE YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE YOU ARE PERFECT JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE YOU.

rockin the little red

A few of my closest friends may know that im a vintage suitcase freek. RED, IT MUST BE RED. my first suitcase was given to me by my dear friend gifford. we were in long beach california in the summer of 03 and he talked me into getting married in vegas. so, for my wedding gift, i chose a red suitcase in a vintage shop on cherry street. we didnt get married no, because i chickened out....but we did have some crazy fun sporting diapers and walking the strip! (i will blog about that when i can scan the pics into my computer, a visual is a must on that one)

so from then on out i have toted the reds. i get them everywhere and i love them. i design the insides so magnificently....you would love them....and i need to start selling them. i started beau on them as soon as we started going out. only he is brown and im red. for his 23rd birthday i gave him a small brown beauty with a MELLINCOLLIN sticker on the outside and a jungle book sticker on the inside. mine has an ATARIS* sticker that i got from a show forever ago!! (but i still do and always will love the ataris) anyway, my new amazing friend becky rockwood is such a gem! she took these pictures of me in her studio....and im in love with them. they were hillarious to take, because lets face it im no model, but man i love em! thanks beck your a babe!:)visit her at littlemischefstudios.com

burn baby burn

las vegas................
im like "bobby pretend to kiss beau!!!"

me and the georgous leah and poop face chris angel

the luxor is bombdiggity and its my house now, this is half of the room we stayed in.

this is my dollar slot machine.....leah was losing patience with me because i only bet one penny at a time. not much of a risk taker folks.

i look like a fat moron in this one but its still cute:)

happy valentines day beau the rose

kiss......like the toungue?

beaufuss and the bobster

in the elavator at hard rock

pink man

slots are stupid and they take your two dollars that you could have gotten two red boxes with

the luxors bed me and all my candy

my deliciousnessssssssssss

bobby and the hot woman

the fancy pants place....boa.

here i look like elane in the episode where they get lost in the parking lot. "these fish are dying"

this was the view from our window....

im gunna go ahead and title this rant burn baby burn................. because one day viva las vegas will do just that. for valentines day beau and i went with our pals bobby and leah to vegas and it was damn amazing. it was the only the second time i have left miss ardee b for a few nights so i pretty much had to drug myself to sleep before bed every night or else id be tossing and turning without her. thank you god for nyquill. so um ok..............it was amazing and fun and perfect. good ole bobby worked his charm with the front desk at the luxor and got us sweets up top (by mr. chris angels room) first thing i did was jump on the beds and then play rich girl. funny thing about this room was that it had a huge glass window that was TINTED (and covered the entire wall) we totalt walked around naked and just hung out thinking no one could possibly see us......like people do right? yeah wrong.....so when we are in the car going to dinner we look up at the hotel and see the rooms all lit up and pretty.....and we notice THAT YOU CAN SEE IN EVERY SINGLE ROOM! so yes folks the entire population of vegas saw our butts.

We stayed out till 3am on valentines day. i havent done that in forever! beau was and still is addicted to roulette. he wone 30 big dollars yo!! im not big on gambeling so i did one slot....and bet a penny each time. i sereously thought i was gunna win big. yeah, im delusional because i lost a big woppin two bucks!! booya! whenever id go up a cent id say " my life is changing leah...i just know it things are changing" the casinos are filled with smoke and boobs. sereously its like babilon. i just kept thinking of the tower in lehis dream. the big and spacious building. vegas will burn and when it does its gunna burn hard.

i wore heels and i dont do this much..... so uptop is a picture of my feet falling off after walking a million miles. we ate at sexie overpriced posh restaurants....and i cringed at the prices. sereously who do these people think they are?

the last night beauie and i stayed in hard rock hotel. (so many memories at this place) i recal me at 19, sober and kissing any stranger i wanted in this place. our place. we ate chocolates in the huge bed and watched rob and big. HEAVEN. beau wanted to go gamble again.....but instead we opted for hard rock cafe and miss BIG DEB for out watrece. big deb is one scary biotch. sereously guys we left her a big tip only because we were scared to ask for change. after this we went to hes just not into you and i picked a fight with beau in the car. (because this movie made me hate ALL STUPID MEN) my poor hubby was like "what did i do?" nothin babe you just have a weener.

on our drive home we listened to a.f.i and screamed our little hearts out. this band is one from both our pasts and was nice to bring back. i need to listen to more of my "old music" the weird old building is one i took on the freeway because it was so pretty.( i love abandoned houses)

it was the best "balemtimes" day ive had in forever. oh wait except for the one when we took arden in her car seat to sizzler and watched john tucker must die instead of doing it because i didnt want to get pregnant again. yeah right, it was amazing. all except for the butts everywhere.

1. 
   
   
   

   highlights of the trip................................
   

   seeing carrot top and screaming at him "hey thats carrot top" and beau goin "wassup man" he was a pretty nice guy, and i feel bad for saying his plastic surgery was botched. your beautifull mister carrot!!
   
   
   
   
2. 
   
   fererra rochera chocolates...... in the pyramid shape box and the hotel that is a pyramid.....eating a pyramid in a pyramid.
   
   
   
3. 
   
   my new purse because its pretty and its was fifty percent off homies!!
   
   
   
4. 
   
   standing by rilo kileys guitar .....liz phairs album from likr 95?
   
   
   
5. 
   
   bobby pinching the maniquins pasties and getting in trouble by the lady.
   
   
   
6. 
   
   our car game "take a day away to play gay and eat chocolate....beaus....rainbow.........wet......green trees in yo mammas fridgadare-only 4 people will understand this.
   
   
   
7. 
   
   eating whatever the crap i wanted
   
   
   
8. 
   
   sleeping in
   
   
   
9. 
   
   the huge tub
   
   
   
10. 
    
    the green velvet chair
    
    
    
11. 
    
    not having a care in the world..........................
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    

"I am absolutely not big. I am still really quite small"

this ones all about little miss arden betty. its amazing to me how much growing our little lady has done in just a few weeks. she is talking up a storm, and not only that...shes so funny! i cant even beleve some of the things shes doing....heres a few.

so yesterday we are getting ready to go out shopping and she insists on wearing her pink tu-tu. im big on letting her express herself and have fun with what shes wearing, so i let her. so out she went....tu-tu, pink tights and snow boots (it was hot) so we're in wal mart and this cute little old lady comes up to us to pinch ardens cheeks and tell her how pretty she is. im smiling and saying thank you, when arden raises her finger and tells the lady " i have a boogie" and what do you know, she has the hugest lime green split pea soup colered curly booger on the tip of her finger!! i could have died! not only was she wearing a halloween costume, but she got ketchup on it from lunch and she looked like tinkerbell who just crawled out of a dumpster. lucky for us the sweet lady handed me a tissue. we were out of there in a heart beat...only the lady gave us wal mart stickers so my dumpster baby had yellow smiley faces all over her to complete the look. the one on the tip of her nose stayed there even as i took the little sleepy head out of the car and in her bed.

next, last night we went to dinner and an old man with a long grayish white beard sat behind us. we were almost finised with dinner when the man excused himself to the bathroom, and arden said "wheres my santa?" and im puzzled, going "what do you mean baby?" i looked over at beau and his eyes are the size of golf balls. "she thinks that man is santa" he says. when we got up to walk out she pointed at him and said "thats my santa" over and over. i wanted to tell him what she ment but didnt want to offend. it was hillarious! here are a few more arden bettys finest.

1. says our dog ( the sweetest dog ever ) hits her "care bear hit me mommy"

2. will only eat orange popcicles and orange gummy vitamins

3.says "my tummy hurts" for attention

4.sings ond mc donald through all the isles at the grocery store

5.when you ask her when she was born she says "bemer" for november

6. does the pee pee dance after she pes on the big girl potty

7.says "daddy workt?" when beaus gone

8.loves to dance iron and wine flightless bird is our song.

8. dances like a chicken

9. has to have "aiel bubbles" ariel bubbles for every bath

10.smeared my premodial cream (like 40 bucks a jar) all over the potty. lucky for me it was a gift from my sister.

11.says "promise" when shes really sereous about something

12. as soon as we arrive at a shoe store she wrips her shoes off and begins trying on the display shoes. she almost got us kicked out of dillards last week.

13.has a brooklin accent example: mine=muyne, , water=woder,bottle=boddle, mom=moum

14.says i love you so sweetly

15.has one litle mischevious curl on top of her head

16. loves root beeeeeer

17.colors on walls, rugs, even herself

18.holds a pencil like a pro

19. loves to have her "finganales" painted, toenails are fingernails too.

20. when asked if shes a baby or a big girl she always replies "im a baby"

21. loves to paint with watercolors....when she wakes up in the morning she says "im paintin"

DEAR ARDEN BETTY YOU LIGHT UP MY LIFE. I LOVE YOUR NAUGHTYNESS AND YOUR LITTLE CROOKED GRIN. I LOVE YOUR SWEET GIGGLE. I LOVE WHEN YOU FLOOD THE BATHROOM AND DUMP BEANS OUT ON THE NEW CARPET. I LOVE YOUR SQUEEKY SHOES AND YOUR POLKA DOTS. I LOVE YOUR POOPIES AND YOUR MESSES. I LOVE YOUR BOOGIES AND YOUR TOYS SCATTERED ALL OVER THE PLACE. I LOVE WATCHING TINKERBELL AT 6 AM WITH YOU. THANK YOU FOR BEING MOMMIES BABY.

purses and bellie dancers

this is me right before i flashed an entire restaurant. one second more and the moment would have been captured forever.

i need a new purse. so after looking everywhere i atually googled "purses that dont suck" or "interesting purses" then realised that suck is a bad word to tipe on this internet thing. so far ive been to a million stores, and im not impressed. i dont need some freek nasty bag with bling on it and a silver poodle. juicy hu? more like made in china by barefooted dirty faced orphens. those purses belong on music videos held by girls named baby girl or baby phat. oh lets not forget the "mom bags" either ......how do you say dried up like a prune? and im not talking about the big bulky ones either, storage is good every mom will agree...im talking about those diaper bags the ones that have winnie the pooh and other characters ment for small children...NOT GROWN WOMEN. i dont understand these people. when you buy a bag like this dont even bother to get ready for the day, you bag says it all it says"dear world i no longer care and i watch winnie the pooh all day long in my pjs"i feel like creating my own purse. IS THERE ANYTHING DECENT AND NOT LAME OUT THERE? ARE YOU THERE GOD ITS ME EMILY" oh wait thats margret. so jeez what else can i rant about? oh i know, i g- flashed about 15 or so people at my friends birthday party this past weekend. yeah not cute, not for a second was this cute. so we are at the cedars of lebinon??? yeah, this amazing little place downtown. jacob from twilight was our server and yes there were bellie dancers. we ate lamb and all this weird lebinese crap ( that was amazing by the way) well, the bellie dancer lets us join in and dance for the entire restaurant. and the heat is on, were dancing, and being "sexie" yeah thats when i took it a bit far and did a little twurl. ......and the entire place saw my silky garmet goodness with a getto booty in tow. thats the second i died. i dont like to be seen naked. i dont like being exposed. i shrugged it off, but relly i was shuddering inside. to me there is nothing worse.

in closing i just want to say that every purse desiner in this universe sucks,but tonight im going to go searching again. maby somewhere there is a little diamond in the rough waiting for me to ruin and spill crackers all over inside because thats what i do. never lend me a purse.